The winter's so cold, summer's over too soon
Let's pack our bags and settle down where palm trees grow
I've got some friends, some that I hardly know
But we've had some times, I wouldn't trade for the world
We chase these days down with talks of the places that we will go"
(Rise Against - Swing Life Away)
I've got some friends, some that I hardly know
Yesterday was my last real day at work and now it's only ten days until I return to Germany. Well, Berlin. Berlin sounds totally different than Germany, doesn't it? At least to my ears, it has a totally different ring to it. But I might be imagining things.
Yesterday was one of those days that seem like they should suck out loud, but... it didn't. It would be wrong to accuse yesterday of being a bad day. My day at work was okay, and yes, I was still suffering from those last symptoms of my cold and a really lazy brain, but other than that, I was doing quite well. I bumped into a guy I know at the store and while my brain really left me in the lurch when trying to talk to him, it was still nice to see him. Gotta tell him that I'll be missing him. Gotta tell him that I think he's a decent guy and I will most definitely miss him. Why do we only tell people stuff like that when we're leaving or when we're dying? Gosh, that sucks. We talked again today and this time my brain worked well enough to at least answer questions and do the words into sentences putting thing. I don't know if you can tell, but I'll be missing him.
But we've had some times, I wouldn't trade for the world
Then - back to yesterday - I bumped into another guy. Well, not any other guy, but... he's kind of "the one that got away" in the narrative of my life. I've had a major crush on him when we first met (and I've told him that once, when the acute crush was over) and I'd actually written off seeing him again before I leave, but there I was just leaving my flat to get a piece of cake (yes.) when he was just walking by my building. We exchanged a few sentences and while I was looking at him, I noticed with a hint of melancholy that we've changed. Now he's not the one that got away because there's never been anything between us, but because he's not there anymore. Or no, that's unfair. He's changed a little. And I've changed a little. And between the two of us we changed a lot; the things that once build a bridge for us to meet on, they were not there anymore. And there we were, the same two people and still two perfect strangers. But it was a good thing for me to see, because it makes it easier for me to leave. It doesn't feel like there is still something left open. Now there's just another tiny scar that tells a story of what once was. It is gone, but it left a mark. We said that we'd see each other again. And maybe we will.
I've got some friends, some that I hardly know...It's an interesting line, really. Because we always talk about friends like they are those people that know everything about us and that we know everything about. I know him/her inside out. But is that really it? Is knowing that someone has a bigger sister and what their favourite band is and that they don't like asparagus what matters? I have friends like these, but I also have friends like those two above. Because to me, friendship is a feeling. Some sense of kinship. Sometimes not even needing words. I remember telling a girl I've known for ten minutes almost everything about my stalker-ex. She ended up being one of my best friends. Still is, even after ten years. I either like and trust someone or I don't, no matter how much I know about them. If I'm happy to see you or I like to spend time with you? Tough luck, I will consider you my friend. Even if we haven't exchanged phone numbers and I don't know where you live. Chances are that that's not important to the kind of friendship we have. There are different types of friendship and not all require actual factual knowledge about each other. Some are just about having a good time, when you see each other. The only thing that bugs me: am I allowed to hug them goodbye? I don't need to know more about them, right now. And guess what? I have never been asked to take a test on any of my friends.
But here's some random fact about me, you are allowed to quote if need be: I quite dislike socks.
No, really, I don't like socks. I rather go without them nasty little buggers.
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