Becoming a Group fitness instructor

I recently started on a journey that could become a quite interesting one; I went through the initial training for Les Mills Body Combat. Now I am allowed to call myself Group Fitness Instructor and stand on stage screaming at people. While moving myself to the beat of the music in the choreographed way. Because this instructor thing? It's not as easy as it looks. 
In the course of the initial training, you get to know the key elements to being a good instructor, but our trainer did not want us to become good, he wanted us to aspire to being World class instructors. However, it's gonna be a long way to World class. First off, there's more elements than you'd probably think.
You got to know and master your technique to set a good example. Then you have to know your choreo to get people moving. You need to know how, when, and what to coach. Make use of your voice. And perform your heart out. Because yes, it is a performance meant to physically move your class as well as entertain them. But that also means your sports performance; you can't hold back on stage. You gotta go the full hog, because only about 60-80% of your intensity reaches your class. If you perform at 60%, your class performs at 40% the most. Gotta go all in. And you know what? Going at 100% for 50min is incredibly exhausting. 
Now that I have been standing in front of a few classes, I have noticed, though, that you get so much positive energy back from a happy class that you really don't even think about reducing speed. 

Back to initial training. We had a whole weekend filled with 6-8 hours sports and instructing. It was hard, but rewarding, and as a group we grew together and it felt like we'd known each other for years and not mere days afterwards. This is where Les Mills' tribe idea comes through, and I for one would love to pass this on to my classes. 
After the weekend, I had to show our group fitness coordinator what I had learned and she gave me a pass as a shadow. With the old choreo still running, I couldn't have done anything else really, but now I got to speak on stage as well. I am allowed to instruct one track until I feel real comfy up there. Well, I am ecstatic to be on stage, but I still have these moments where I get overwhelmed by all the multitasking. So, it's going to be a while. But I already got some great feedback about my stage presence and movement, I have to put in some work into letting go and not trying to hide behind my team teach partner, though. 

Let's see how this pans out, but I'm happy as a clam. 

Project "Back to Bantam"

So, I've rarely ever cared about my weight as a number, because it rarely ever has been a problem or anything. I usually go with how I feel and when my favourite jeans feel a little tight for a change, then I ate a little more strict, meaning less carbs and sweets, but more veggies and protein. But. 

You might have noticed that MMA (mixed martial arts) and BJJ (Brazilian Jiu Jitsu) are weight-class sports and when you are actively competing, you have an advantage when you are able to compete in a weight-class that has opponents about your own size. For males that is rarely a big problem. It might get uncomfy for them, but the biggest weight difference possibly are 5kg or 10lbs. For women however, this looks different, at least in BJJ-tournaments, because there just aren't enough women to fill all weight classes. And since it doesn't make any sense to have three or four weight-classes with 3 competitors each tops, they are mostly just divided into -60kg/+60kg. And let me tell you, it is no fun whatsoever to compete against someone weighing in at about 78kg, when you yourself are 65kg, which is my "happy weight". 

This being said, a friend and training mate of mine is fighting in MMA featherweight (-65,7kg), so if we ever were to start in the same competition, chances are that if I was my happy weight, we'd be fighting against each other. Which just isn't fun, because a) for the fighters it is never fun to hurt a friend, and b) for the audience it's kind of boring, because both fighters know the other's strengths and weaknesses, and tend to avoid them, which makes them careful, which makes the fight a boring escape-game. 

After my moving back to Germany this summer and the stress at work I've had before, I actually weighed about 71kg when I arrived in Berlin. After a month of okay eating I was back at 69kg. Which was still too much. Then my trainer told me after my first Jits competition here in Berlin that I had to lose weight, if I did not want to face opponents significantly bigger than me (what happened to me during the White Belt Challenge). So, yeah, I knew I was going to have to diet. And then, my "blood thirst" or rather competition spirit awoke after a few sessions back in MMA, the spirit I'd been missing after this spring's competition debacle (preparing for four different comps, making weight, thus harming my metabolism, and being told that there is no opponent). Said team mate told me that we could run the world together, if we weren't in the same weight class. And well, she's a few centimetres taller than me and doesn't have anything left to lose, except for a foot or a hand, because she's totally shredded. So, it's my turn to lose weight, and go down to Bantam class (61,2kg). Not to cut it, because I don't want to wreak havoc on my metabolism again, but slowly lose it. 

I've done this once before, in 2014, when I wanted to compete at -60kg in the Finnish Amateur Open, and back then it worked well. I just felt like I looked a little anorexic as soon as I reached 61kg. Also, friends and family started telling me to stop losing weight. So, I gained some back. I knew I could do this, so, I was ready to go, when my trainer told me what to cut and what to not cut even though it might sound like you should cut it. Like carbs in general. Cut the simple carbs, the ones your body burns through right away, which don't give it anything for fuel. But keep the complex carbs, the ones your body needs to keep up power. Because you need power to train. Oh, and he was pretty clear in that I can't have candy. Which doesn't matter, because I don't like candy anyway. The chocolate however is a whole other thing. I miss chocolate. I have an allowance of one bar of dark chocolate per week (55g), of which I am allowed to eat before craving gets out of hand. But after that, none. 

You can't imagine how hangry I got in the beginning. There's nothing that sucks as much as sugar withdrawal. Because yes, sugar is addictive. And I don't really know the middle ground, I either go all the way or I don't eat anything. 

So, yeah, working with a 1600-2000kcal/day diet (depending on how much and what I'm doing on the gym side of things) right now and last Monday I was already down to 66.3kg. Only 5kg to go, so 1/3 of the way went in two weeks. It's going to slow down, though. It always does. 

I also changed my exercise regimen, I am now attending 3 BJJ classes, 2 MMA classes, 2 Combat classes, 2 Crossfit classes, 1 Body Attack class, 1 LMIStep class, 1 Pump class, 1 rolling session and 1 boxing class a week, if everything works out. However, it rarely works out perfectly, so most of the time two to four classes a week don't work out, because of work or soreness/failure to recover properly in time. 

This is another thing I've changed; I am now taking rest seriously, too. There is one day a week, where I don't do anything, and every five weeks, I take it really easily. 

During project "Back to Bantam", I have so far fallen in love with Crossfit, LMIStep, and found my abs again. I can actually see them again (in the right lighting :D ). Also, I am feeling better now, and maybe I have become a little judgmental, when I see people eating crap, but that's probably just jealousy in most cases. Because yes, some days, a muffin would be great. Or a brownie. Or red velvet cake. And yes, I am still hangry every now and then, and nothing sucks more than having your calories for the day used or planned and then thinking about eating something great. But all in all, I'm doing okay. When I reach Bantam weight, I can add a good 200-300kcal to my diet again, but until then, well, it's really strict. Today I was totally excited, because I could eat a jackload of stuff, because the main ingredient was spinach which has so few calories that you can eat away at it until you burst, basically (not really, but almost). It's the simple things. 

CrossFit can't be that great...oh, nevermind

So, I only meant to try CrossFit to be able to take part in the debates going on about it. I was a sceptic, but I wanted to give it a try. And after the second class I was already hooked. There's something epic about doing stuff you didn't think you could do (e.g. handstand push-ups) and that other people will never do in their lives. So, what I mean to say is: it's not a cult, it's a lifestyle. And it's not about being the best, but being better than before. And even though everybody is encouraging you and cheering you on, no one is gonna keep you from giving up, which means you have to get through it with sheer will power sometimes. It hurts, but you see improvements and development even after a few sessions. I was the last person I ever expected to say this, but CrossFit is amazing. I just sold my soul to a great box with a great trainer and I am totally happy about that decision. 

Feel the burn...

Handstand push - ups on a box. Good morning, shoulders. Ouchie. This CrossFit - thing is worse than I thought. And more fun. And it hurts more. And it's way more addictive. Having the time of my life right now with MMA, BJJ and CrossFit. I'm probably in way better shape at 30 than I've been at 20. :D

Those last few weeks...

...have been quite busy and a little exhausting. Mind you, I'm far from complaining, but there have been so many firsts that I don't even know where my head's at right now. I haven't yet had the time to mentally or emotionally catch up to where we're going right now.  

Firstly, I moved to Berlin. And signed my work contract on the same day just to start working almost right away for four days straight. In a new job, new field. I'm now a proud member of the IKEA clan. But. I'm also working in gastronomy. How that's possible? Well, I'm working for IKEA Food, which entails everything from selling to cooking to actually serving the customers and working the cash register. The good thing is: it never gets boring. There's always new things to learn. But well, that means a whole lot of mental input. But it's fun. My work mates are great. And payment as well as the way IKEA takes care of its employees could not be better seeing that, on average, I work only three days a week.

Secondly, I've travelled to Amsterdam for the first time. Because I only work three shifts a week, I can travel quite freely without even being on vacation. My brother had his summer vacation and thus we decided to make the six hour train/nine hour bus trip to the capitol of the Netherlands. And it's been great. I fell in love with the relaxed atmosphere in the city and its Grachten and the red light district where everyone's just allowed to be themselves and do whatever they enjoy without judgement. Also, my brother was a great companion, keeping me from shopping too extensively, but making me see things I didn't necessarily know I wanted to see. I've rarely walked this much in spite of having a tram ticket. Emotionally, the Anne Frank Huis really got to me. It's strange what human beings do to others, sometimes. I can't understand it. And I don't want to. One of the things that stuck with me was the sentence: "Her would haves are our possibilities" and in keeping with that, I now try to help people whereever and whenever I can. Also, I feel like I ate myself through most of Amsterdam's food offerings. Macaroons? I tried everything that sounded good to my ears and taste buds. Pancakes? Tried them filled with egg and salmon, decked out with bacon, cheese and syrup, and with Nutella. Belgian waffles? Yes, with Nutella, with ice cream, and with ice cream and Nutella. I also tasted myself through a whole cheese shop, had some chocolate-hemp ice cream and strop waffles. Had some espresso though I ordered coffee. Ate some great Zwieback-biscuits. And I peed at a public toilet that had a great view over the whole city centre (sorry, if that's tmi, but it really impressed me). 

Back from Amsterdam, I had a day to prepare for the visit of my mother. Three days with her and my brother planning our US-trip for 2016. 

And this last week went into getting back into some kind of everyday life like I'm used to. I dragged my old gym buddy to my new gym to attend XpressDay and do the new Les Mills choreos with me. And now I got an old new gym buddy :) Then I tried CrossFit. And fell in love-hate with it. I was so sore for three days, it wasn't even funny. So yes, first CrossFit workout? Done and done. Afterwards I ran into my German MMA partner in crime from January, who convinced me to join her in Jiu Jitsu practice. I was totally done after CrossFit, but I said yes anyways. The DOMS was strong that week. And then I finally got back to BJJ practice and made a contract with Randori Pro. Oh, and at the same time I was asked if I wanted to compete at White Belt Challenge next Saturday. I said yes. So, first competition in Germany coming up, too. So much about my pondering of maybe really just doing this for my fitness and fun. 

Oh, and before I forget; before moving to Berlin I considered applying for a certain job at a certain firm. I thought, I'd know when the time is right, when it feels right. Yeah, turns out, life is what happens while you are busy making other plans: said firm asked for applications for said job on their facebook-page. No need to say, I've already sent in my application. 

So, does anyone understand why I could maybe need a moment to get to the surface and get a good glimpse at the situation that is my life? I feel like everything is just happening all the time and I'm playing it by ear, and mostly that's okay with me, I'm good at just winging it, but I might just need a moment to get my bearings right. Though I have to admit, if everything continues like that, I might just be okay with continuing like this. 

Never judge a book by its cover. Or: a week back in Germany

"I've got fire for a heart, I'm not scared of the dark, never made it look so easy [...] Nobody's gonna drag me down" 

(One Direction - Drag Me Down)

This has been the soundtrack to my first week back in Germany. How has life in Germany treated me so far? The answer is, I'm not sure. It still feels like I'm only on vacation. I mean, yeah, I've been working five days within the last seven days, but work doesn't feel like work. It's strange to think that I get money for giving people food and taking their money. It's pretty physical, yes, but fun, too. And our team is just great. I love the fact that people are talking Russian and Turkish left and right, even though I understand neither. But yeah, it's kind of surreal that I get paid for this.

Then I started following the youtube-account "Yoga with Adriene" and the accounts "30 Days of Yoga"-videos, meaning I've been doing yoga every day for at least 20min, which is astonishingly addictive. Or rather: I notice how I feel worse when I don't down-dog and plank and stretch it out. 

On the gym side of things, I've been a little lazy, only going to the gym every other day. Went to Grit Plyo on Thursday and boy, the instructor was...for lack of a more sophiaticated word...hot. And he knew what he did. which made him even hotter. But yeah, was a great Grit.

Saturday I went to a Combat class. The fourth Combat class I've attended in Germany at Superfit this far and for the first time I had an instructor who knew what she was doing. For the first time an instructor that could be compared to the ones in Finland. I'm a spoiled brat, when it comes to this because I'm used to instructors on a really high level. Good-looking, fun, nice instructors that are really good at what they're doing. Which brings me to the topic at hand: yesterday I went to BodyStep and BodyPump at Superfit Mitte and there was this dude on stage that looked a little like a charicature or Goofy as an instructor: he wore one of those 80's sweatbands on his forehead and short shorts and his hair looked funny and I was just like: "You kidding me?!?" But I thought that it'd be better to do some uninspired training with him than just leave and go later in the day. 

And right I was. Partly. It was a good decision to stay. And I was wrong; the classes were far from uninspired. Actually, they were two of the most fun and rad classes I've been to in Germany. One of the greatest BodyStep-classes overall. And not in spite of but because of his quirky personality that was paired with a great deal of knowledge about technique and anatomy. He gave great pointers and made me laugh more than once during the two hours that just flew by. He still reminded me of Goofy, but by the end of Pump-class it didn't matter any more, because he won me over. In spite of my previously made decision that no one is ever gonna be as great as the instructors at my Finnish gym. 

Another one that really got to me was the BodyAttack instructor whose class I already went to in August. She's not funny like Goofy, but she gets me to do stuff. She's efficient. And nice to look at. I'm not into girls, but if I were, I'd definitely crush on her. 

When it comes to MMA/BJJ, it's still rather boring, because I did not have the peace of mind to go and set up the contract with the gym. Also, there's a shitload of stuff ahead right now. The next two days, I'll be out of town and then it's the weekend and they're closed and then my mom's here and then it's almost October again. Ugh. And there's my five day work week next week, because I only have one day this week. But after me mom's gone, I'll be putting some effort in there, too. But right now, I got drive and I'm unsettled and I got itchy feet and wanderlust and yeah. I'll keep you posted about my ex tempore stunt that's gonna happen this night. 

Grit Summer Games - To puke or not to puke that is the question

So, today our gym held a nice little event called Grit Summer Games. I've been talking about Grit before, Les Mills' own HIIT-series with focus on either basic strength, explosive strength or cardio. I was a little nervous beforehand, because we weren't told what exercises were awaiting us at the gym. All we knew was that there'd be 9 different exercises and we'd have 45sec per exercise during which we had to perform as many reps as possible. Then 15sec rest and on to the next exercise. 

The exercises were: 1. Clean-and-press (20kg for women, 30kg for men), 2. sumo jumps from a step-board, 3. burpees (of course there were burpees...), 4. bent over rows (again 20kg women, 30kg men), 5. lateral jumps across a step board, 6. c-crunches with a plate (5kg women, 10kg men), 7. squat to overhead press with a 5kg plate, 8. push-ups and finally 9. my least favourite exercise in the history of ever: the jumping lunge. I even prefer burpees to the jumping lunges, which is mostly because my legs are about to give out 3 reps in on a good day.

Today was not a good day, I might add. Firstly, I am still sore from all the stuff I've done all week, especially grappling on Friday and Pump+Combat on Saturday (yeah, I know, I should have rested, had I taken this seriously. But this was for fun). And secondly, well, just try doing jumping lunges after already being so far beyond your lactate threshold that all you want to do is hug your toilet bowl close and your triceps' have already failed you and your quads are burning. 

What I want to convey: it felt great, even more than great afterwards (as most HIITs), but during the thing, I wanted to quit, scream, puke, quit again, throw myself onto the ground and cry. I did nothing, but go on. I tried to think of nothing but the next rep. Clean-and-presses are one of my favourite exercises, and I got 17 of those, already feeling slightly winded, and there was a little burn already, because normally I half-ass them with 15kg (I never realised I half-assed them until today). The sumo jumps are usually not my kind of thing, I like them, but - as with the jump lunges - my legs don't really like 'em, meaning I start strong and after 15sec my legs are on fire. But the competitor across from me and I pushed each other through this and I got 39 of those, too. Severly winded it was burpee time. And cue the sickness. I'm quite good with exercising at a high intensity, but as soon as we take it to the ground, I get really sick and a little dizzy. Something about lactate acid, I was told. Halfway through the bent over rows, my left triceps failed, but I tried to do as much as possible with my back. Still, the last few reps where a bit lopsided. The lateral jumps were a whole other thing, because you need some kind of coordination to land on the step board and at that point, I was already so tired that this seemed a Mission Impossible. Again, my heart rate soared and it was down to the ground. Serious retching going on. But the crunches went fine. Not well, but okay. Then the squat jumps in itself were okay, but then again, almost none of us did them with the right technique or movement range in the beginning and that made them a loooot meaner. Thank goodness, my triceps recovered at least a little until it was time to do push-ups, but I still did those ten at a time, short stretch into child's pose. I actually got quite far with this technique. 39 push-ups in 45sec is not too bad. But yeah, the lunge jumps were horrific. I only did 29 of those and all the time I was afraid my legs would give out any second. 

Still, this was a fun and interesting experience and I know where I have to push a little more. Next time I'm doing something like this, I will get at least 45 push-ups in those 45 seconds. And I will work on my burpees. I got to have some goal now, because moving tomorrow (effectively the day after tomorrow), I have to switch gyms and one of the reasons I never had to think about going to the gym was that I knew certain instructors' classes would be fun and missing them would be a pity. Now I need some internal motivation again, until I know the who's who of my new gym. So, yeah. (I also have to lose about 8kg before the competition season for MMA starts...but that's a whole other story)

Anyhow, I believe the Grit Summer Games have been A) an incredible success, B) fun, C) a possibility to overcome oneself and get out of this comfort zone nobody likes these days and D) a great way to wrap up summer and effectively my membership at Gogo. I'll still be pretending that it doesn't end tomorrow, as I'm going to take one last class with one of my favourite instructors. After that I got about half an hour to get to my train to the airport, so that hopefully realisation only hits when I'm sitting on this train. 

Grit Strength, or: I challenge you to focus on your technique

Ugh, please remind me to never half-ass technique during a Grit-class again. Today I decided to concentrate on technique rather than rep count and I got myself so much more exhausted, it's not even funny anymore. Normally, I just do everything as fast as possible and as many reps as possible, sacrificing the right technique and weight. I could easily up the weight on my bar a little if my pride didn't take a hit when I have to take a break or get in less reps than the person next to me. 

But today, I always started out with clean technique and the burn was a whole other. For example: I hate nothing more than burpees, except for jump lunges. I hate those from the bottom of my heart, mostly because whereas my upper body has been responding really well to training and gains and stuff, my lower body just stays as chicken-y as ever. I got chicken-y legs and all the same how much I squat and eat, I don't gain any muscle (or fat) below my knees and even on my thighs, it's mostly fat. So, my legs are my weakness. And I hate regular lunges, because they mostly burn in my quads, not my bum or the back of my thighs, where you supposedly feel them. Most people have a muscle and strength imbalance between the front and the back of their thighs, which is why they tend to push up with their quads rather than their behind, which is why in turn instructors always keep telling you to push through your front heel and pinch your butt cheeks together while pushing up. In my case... both sides are equally weak. But, I noticed already before my short vacation in Germany, that I have much more power and strength and don't tire as fast (on a muscular level) if I actually go deeper and sit into the lunge and go down to that infamous 90° angle. The cardial fitness is another thing all together, because engaging my butt, I get out of breath rather quickly (larger muscle, and the gluteus maximus is one if not the biggest muscle in your body, higher oxygen consumption), but as I said, on a muscular level I don't tire as quickly, because my butt cheeks take much longer getting sore than my quads.

Do it the right way. Also, remember to eat well. My day in four pictures.

The point I meant to make: the cardio part of the workout was driven home much harder (muscles use up oxygen while working, so you don't need to run to get winded) and now my butt hurts. And the rest of my body hurts in exciting new ways or with a new intensity. So, for your health's and your fitness' sake, listen to your instructor even if going down to a 90 degree angle sounds impossible. It's actually easier. Or well, maybe it just hurts differently and in my case less. But yeah, listen to what advice they have to offer. Look at their posture and movement radius. Yes, you can do 20 squats in the time they do 10, but those 20 actually are as useful as 0 if you only quickly pulse between a 0 and 45° angle. So, if you do it, do it right, even if that means you have to swallow your pride when the small chick next to you does 20 more reps than you do. In the end, it's your workout. And while your pride might benefit from keeping up with her half-assing your technique, your body doesn't. 

It's getting hot, hot, hotter than hell...

There was this song by the Finnish band Reckless Love and it starts becoming the soundtrack to my days here in Berlin. After leaving the limestone cave that was Finnish summer, I arrived in Central Europe, where there's almost sauna-like temperatures. Working out in this heat ain't fun, even in the morning my body feels like a wet cloth. So, working out is like dragging a wet cloth through the gym and back. But still, it's fun.

I don't sweat, I sparkle. Or how did the quote go?

Monday, I went in the morning and did some Body Attack, Tuesday I did some gym routine and incorporated a few moves from the current Grit Strength. Wednesday I went with a friend in the evening and we did something here, something there. And yesterday I first took Body Combat to the next level (Hot Body Combat) and then I showed my baby brother his way around the weight room. Which was incredibly funny, because the dudes back in the free weight zone weren't sure what's happening, since a) the girl describes to the boy what he has to do and b) what exactly is the relationship between those two?!? But yeah, leaving my Finnish home gym GoGo still feels bad, but not as bad, now that I know that Superfit is an okay-option. It's not GoGo, it never will take GoGo!0's place, but it's a nice gym with nice enough members and instructors.

But I didn't go to Berlin to workout (well, or not exclusively), I went to a couple of job interviews and did some official business preparing my move to Berlin. Since yesterday, I'm officially a Berliner again. Feels strange. Okay, but strange. Well, and come September 1st, I'll be living and working here. I hate leaving Tampere, but I do love Berlin as well. I've already found a load of great places here and the possibilities are endless. And it's the best place to be to do the stuff I wanna do. stay tunes ;)

Life changes even the best of plans... I'm doing Gains, Lean Gains

and isn't that the truth. In June, I had decided for myself that I wanted to go down to Bantam-weight, to get a feeling for my body at 61,2kg (135lbs.). Little did I know. I am not entirely sure how I ended up doing what I did, but at some point I noticed that I was actually working out harder than ever and my muscles were sore as hell more often than they were not. Don't get me wrong, I'm a fan of sore muscles to some extend, but I also know that to actually build muscle, you have to eat more than your normal calorie intake, because your body needs energy to build and protein from which to build new muscle fibres. So, hanging around at a caloric deficit of 500kcal/day seemed like a terrible waste of workouts. 

The actual math is something like this: To actually build muscle mass you need a positive energy balance of at least 500-1000kcal a day. You also need to get about 1,2-2g protein per kilogram of body mass. For me at about 65kg that would be 78-130g of protein a day. Fuck a duck with a Christmas tree. You know how much more I have to eat to get to these figures? Especially with no sugar involved? Thank heavens, there's peanut butter, nuts and other healthy stuff high in calories. 

You also have to get a good amount of carbs, because they fuel your workouts and keep you powered. Also, recovery is easier and faster when your body is able to refill its glycogen stores (that's basically the tank that keeps the energy your muscles are burning while working) relatively fast. So, you should try to eat within 30 minutes after your workout. 

So, gains, yes? We are going to do gains, body? The treacherous thing with gains, however, is that I have a tendency to underestimate my caloric intake and I always want to be on the safe side: did I really eat enough to turn this pain into muscle? Or even worse: justify eating loads with "yeah, I'm doing gains right now"

I have tried a system last summer that actually worked pretty well for me: Lean Gains.

My biceps after a month of gains

Lean Gains is basically another form of intermittent fasting; meaning you don't fast for a longer amount of time, but for short bouts at a time. The most popular form of intermittent fasting these days may be the 5:2 diet (I tried that, too, for a while, but that's a whole chapter of its own), but lean gains don't quite work like 5:2. With 5:2 you eat 5 days of the week normally and on the two remaining days, you eat less than 600kcal (men) or 500kcal (women), with the fast days not being on consecutive days. 

Lean gains, however, make you eat enough food to build muscle, but - as the name already says - promise to keep you lean. You have to calculate your daily caloric intake via a formula based on your basic metabolic rate, your level of activity and whether it's a rest day or not. See the infographic at the bottom for more info. After that you need to know, when to eat. You got 8 hours a day within which you eat those calories. The rest of the day, that would be 16 hours on Planet Earth, you fast. You take BCAA supplements, but you don't eat. For me the schedule looked as follows: 

5:30 get up, drink a cup of tea (because I don't do black coffee)

6:30 go to work

10:00 breakfast break, biiiiig breakfast

13:00 lunch

15:00 dinner (because most of my workouts begin around 17-19 o'clock and I can't move on a full stomach)

17/18 (just before workout) small energy boosting snack

18-10 FAST

You'd think this is hard, but actually it isn't. Because of work, my mind is mostly kept off eating in the mornings anyways and 10am is the first chance I get to have a break and thus breakfast. The only clear disadvantage is, that you're feeling full for those 8 hours you are allowed to eat, but also you crave food like it's not even funny anymore. Once you get to eat, your metabolism starts revving up and it goes full speed baby. 

This does work. I did not gain any significant weight during my gain phase and I've been eating A LOT. I have gained water weight, though, because I usually don't eat that much carbs.

Still, there are some Downsides to this method:

1. Keep in mind that you are meddling with your metabolism. If something feels off, don't continue with this until you know it's safe (consult a doctor, personal trainer, dietitian, etc.).

2. Food cravings, baby. And those ain't funny.

3. Food babies and inability to move because you just ate 6 hours straight and well... now it's time to train. I look like I weigh twice my weight most of the time because during the hours I do eat, I carry a heavy food baby with me. And sometimes, when I don't time my eating right or had something more difficult to digest, it actually does get in the way of effective work outs.

4. Hunger. Like, you're going from one extreme - the foodbaby - to the other, namely hunger. Your body in a fasted state wants food and it makes itself known. Those pangs are short and go by rather quickly, but if you have a tendency to get hangry (like I do), those can be very inconvenient. 

Upsides:

1. Lean gains. Need I say more?

2. feeling really satiated without the guilt. 

3. something you really did not want to know: incredibly regular bowel movements.

I found this on the interwebs when I was looking for info on this issue and I found it very helpful:

My upcoming week in workouts

So, I was talking about planning ahead when it comes to workouts to fit them into your schedule and also to give yourself something to do during rest days. This is what I have planned for the upcoming week:

Monday: Body Jam and Body Pump as a combo if my ear is still hurting. If my ear is okay I'm going with Body Jam and Grappling/10th Planet Jiu Jitsu training. 

Tuesday: MMA stand up training and Body Balance. 

Wednesday: I got an invitation by my stand up coach to come to the Muay Thai sparring session. It depends on my feeling that day. If I don't feel sharp enough, I'll be going to Body Combat and Grit Strength.

Thursday: getting a massage in the morning. Then maybe Body Combat in the evening, if my muscles are forgiving.

Friday: Grappling. Maybe Body Combat before.

Saturday: forced rest, because I'm working all day.

Sunday: Body Balance, CX, Grit Strength. Maybe Combat. 

What do You do on a rest day?

Mostly, when I know I have to have a rest day, I really don't know what to do with myself and I find myself at the gym. Again. I know, I should not do it, but it happens all the time. So, what can you do on a rest day to make it a success?

This is me, basically.

1) A rest day does not mean that you only sit around, watching tv, doing nothing. You can go to the gym. You just shouldn't do the weight-lifting, cardio -thing. I had my rest day today and I went to the gym. To go to a Body Balance class. Body Balance, as a mix of Yoga, Tai Chi and Pilates, is a pretty great option on a rest day. I mostly half-ass the Pilates core workout on rest days, but otherwise it is great. The Tai Chi warm up gets your body to softly open up, it helps cramped up muscles to release tension, but it does not force them to work. The sun salutation track does the same thing, but it also starts adding in some dynamic stretches, which feel pretty great after training your body into a stiff, cramped up ball of pain. At least that's why I love it. The Warrior poses in the next track do engage your leg and core muscles and you can get a pretty intense workout if you go low enough and really challenge yourself, but on a rest day you can engage your muscle just as much as you need to to get your upper body relaxed. Also, at the same time as you are using your lower body's muscles, your stretching them, so in the end it does not challenge you in the same way squats do. And, what can I say, but the balance and stretching tracks are just perfect on a day like this. And the Savasana at the end lets you deeply relax all of your muscles and calm your mind.

Other options for "working out" on a rest day include Yoga and stretching. Maybe a walk around town or the woods, but nothing where you effectively get out of breath. Also, with Yoga, I am not talking about Yoga strength classes or Hot Yoga that effect your circulatory system, but rather about Yoga stretches and relaxation techniques.

2) Eat well. Because it is on your rest days that your body gets to replenish its energy reserves and re-build cracked up muscle fibers. Your body needs nutrition to repair these microscopical tears in your muscle fibres that help you get stronger and buffer.

My dinner today. Lots of protein. I had a load of carbs for lunch in the form of cereal, so dinner was a low-carb affair.

3) Meet friends. This is one thing I happen to neglect most of the time. If my friends don't go to the gym with me or ring me up, I mostly don't see them on training days. So, on rest days I make the best of the amount of spare time I have, and meet my friends.

4) Do stuff you don't have the time or energy to do on gym days. Like I went through all my closets and cupboards to discard and chuck a load of stuff I don't need. I also prepared my meals for the rest of the week so I don't have to think about cooking when I come from the gym in the evening. Plus, I cleaned the whole kitchen because I felt like it.

5) Get a massage. You're not supposed to do any great strength training efforts after that anyway and it helps get metabolic waste out of your system.

6) Take photos of your achievements. See how far you've come. Set new goals if necessary, do planning for your workouts. I planned my whole workout week today.

I'm pretty stoked that my biceps is starting to grow. 

So, basically, do all kinds of stuff that keep you busy and feel good. Eat. Have fun. Sleep in. Do whatever helps you to bounce back better after your rest day.

Working out in the heat

Now, while it's great that we finally got great summer weather, the rising temperatures may be a problem for some. Especially as the quicksilver in Central Europe climbs up to almost 40°C, you might not be willing or feeling able to work out. 

Scientists in an University of Oregon study have found out that working out in the heat might help you achieve better results (they made a study with bikers driving in 110°F (approx. 42°C) heat over a 14 day period and found out that their performance improved more than the performance of a control group training in a room at 55°F. The bikers needed some time to acclimate, but after that they really got it on. 

Bikram yoga is another example of making use of heat during a workout. Your muscles give in easier to stretches making it is easier to get into poses that are hard to get into at normal room temperature. 

There are, however, a few things you should remember when working out in the heat:

1. Drink enough, but not too much.

This one is almost self-explanatory. Drink enough to stay hydrated to fend off dizziness, cramps etc., don't drink too much as this might lead to a loss of sodium within your body. Check the colour of your urine to see if you drank enough or too much, it should be a light colour, not clear but not strongly yellow either. 

2. Give your body time to acclimate and take breaks when necessary.

I had to learn this the hard way. My body really doesn't like the heat and even after getting used to it, it still doesn't react the same way it does in 15-20°C weather, which is my optimum. I get dizzy a lot and quickly, my chest starts to restrict. Take breaks if something feels off. Don't push through it if you're not sure what's going on. Normally it takes your body a few days to acclimate. Take baby steps. Start with a walk, not a run. See how you feel and if it's okay, then start running. 

3. Don't work out when the heat is at its worst. Keep to the shadows if possible (and remember sunscreen).

Self-explanatory, isn't it? You don't need a heat stroke. You really don't. 

I love morning workouts in the summer because it's already light out and at 5 am there's few people crossing your pass and you got the whole town to yourself. Or the beach. 

Me at the beach at 5:30 in the morning. I have this habit of running and ending my run there with a swim. It's cool.

4. Wear the right clothes.

Light-weight, breathing clothes, maybe special heat gear, maybe breathable cotton help your body's cooling system. And it feels nice to feel a light breeze on your skin now, doesn't it? 

5. Maybe go for a nice swim?

It doesn't always have to be running or jogging or weight lifting. Try some alternatives like going for a swim or doing a nice yoga, Tai Chi or Pilates workout that does not raise your heart rate as hard as e.g. a run. 

6. Always listen to your body!

This is imperative. Because your body knows when it has had enough. Your body gives you signs when it is time to stop. Tune in to your body and you'll know what's the deal and if you can go for another five minutes. 

7. Enjoy.

Don't forget to enjoy the heat, too. There's all this great, great stuff like ice cream, the feeling of the sun in your face or your skin in general, the light, the mood. It's summer, take it easy. 

Sore muscles, happy pain?

When I woke up this morning, it took me a moment to get up, because I was so sore. I took a short inventory and my upper body was really beaten up, but my lower body was still a little sore, too. Especially my gluteus medius, part of my bum. 

My schedule this week was Sh'Bam on Monday evening, Spinning and CX Tuesday morning as well as striking practice and Body Balance Tuesday evening. Wednesday I went to a Body Pump class in the morning and - finally - grappling training in the evening. So, I deserved the soreness, but still. I like being sore up to a certain point. If it exceeds that point, I get whiny. And today was a whiny day. Everything hurt, and since I do physical work, I really felt it most of the time. 

Which brings me to the point of this post. There are all these motivational fitspo pictures saying that "pain is weakness leaving the body" or "no pain, no gain", but should you really go for that burn every time? 

Sure, being sore gives most people a feeling of accomplishment. It is a way of proving to yourself that you put in the work. You can tell your friends about your sore legs, post about them on social media. All of that. Oh, and it is totally worth it, posting about accomplishments on facebook, twitter or the social media outlet of your choice. Studies showed that it actually helped keep up motivation in people who set themselves the goal of getting fitter. 

This just as an aside. That burn you feel while working out is lactate acid that accumulates in the muscle and the pain you feel when you're sore are microruptures in your muscle tissues and when they heal, they grow back stronger (if you give your body the right nutrients to grow). So, to gain muscle, does it have to hurt? No, it doesn't. But it's a walk on a tightrope, because you have to hit the zone where you challenge your muscles enough to encourage growth, but you can't come on to strong. At the same time, you shouldn't go to hard, but you have to go hard enough to challenge your body. And that's probably why most people like being sore. It's almost instant feedback that the workout did come through. And that's okay. However, keep in mind that being sore means that - in a way - you're injured. And as it goes with all injuries, you have to give your body time to heal. Take a rest day. You deserved it. 

In that spirit, I had a great rest day today. I walked a lot ("Walk it off") and had good food to give my body the material to bounce back stronger. 

So, enjoy your soreness and your rest day!

Motivation - what get's me going when I don't want to go?

I've been training 10-15h a week on average - come rain, come shine - for the last two and a half years if not longer. I usually do a session in the morning and one in the evening. This led to some seriously confused faces, especially during times when I had loads of stuff on plate, like uni, work, internships etc. One of my friends straight up asked me, how I am able to deal with having no spare time at all. 

The secret is: sports and training to me are spare time. Quality spare time to be honest. Whenever I got a crazy schedule, the first thing to go is tv. Now, I don't even own tv (I got a tv, with a dvd-player, that's not hooked up to satellite or anything), so if I watch tv shows and movies, it's after a longer period of contemplation of what I could watch. If I have no time, well, then there is no tv. You got no idea of the amounts of hours one can while away by just hanging around in front of a tv (or mindless surfing on the internet for that matter), even though there isn't even anything interesting on. So, there's a goldmine of hours you can potentially use for exercise. 

After useless time in front of the tv is gone, I start to plan my days more effectively. There've been times where my life was scheduled down to the minute (well, 15min intervals to be exact).

Me this morning at 7am waiting for Body Pump class to start.

But why would I do all that for... exercise? 

Because training to me is a habit that helps me deal with stress, is fun and lets me interact with people. I don't even think about it any more, I have a routine and I stick to that routine, sometimes for months. There are days when I don't even think about it anymore, the act of packing and shouldering my gym bag being so natural that I might find myself at the gym at the time I've always been there, without even noticing it. 

There are times when this is more difficult, though.

When I am on a really tight schedule. I plan ahead. I write down every single engagement and meeting and then I fit in the classes or the exercise I can do around them. Sometimes I also make appointments according to my workout schedule (actually I do this as far as possible).

When I am exhausted or my muscles are extremely sore. But. That is actually a sign to consider. If I'm so sore that getting out of bed in the morning seems like a daunting task, then I know I should consider a rest day. Mostly I get up, stretch a little, do some light sun salutations and evaluate the situation again when I got the morning stiffness out of my limbs. If it feels okay, I go, if not: rest day (or some light alternative exercise like Body Balance or Yoga) it is.

When I really don't want to go to training. Well, that happens rarely enough. And if it happens then it is mostly a certain kind of training I am not particularly interested in at that moment, which may be due to having done too much of it for a prolonged amount of time or just not wanting to do it at that moment. Mostly I just try to figure out what my problem is exactly and then see if I might be interested in another way of training or another class. If this goes on for a prolonged amount of time, I try to get behind the reasons why I don't like to do that right now and why I started doing it in the first place. Right now, I'm a little stuck with MMA, because spring has been pretty rough and full of major and minor disappointments, plus I trained a lot in spring, sometimes just forcing myself to train because "I have a match coming up and I have to go". In addition I wasn't allowed to do any submission wrestling for a few weeks because of my neck-shoulder-condition (that starts getting better) and my work schedule has been pretty stuffed. So, I decided to not feel guilty about taking those few weeks off, because afterwards I can go back to training for the fun of it. 

When I'm feeling generally uninterested in anything. That's when I just kick my own butt to the gym, because I know that afterwards I will feel better. It helps that many of our instructors at my gym are just great guys and gals, who I really enjoy seeing/meeting. Plus, normally, I love MMA, submission wrestling, Body Combat, Grit, bouldering and Body Pump. And maybe that's what's most important: finding a sport or class you love to go to. Finding a way of training you enjoy. And once you've found it, it's like I said in the beginning: training is quality spare time. 

Sh'Bam - or: comfort zones are personal

So, I had a great graduation weekend, but yesterday it was back to business as usual. I had a lot of stuff to do in the morning (massage, seeing my friend off, etc.) and then I was already expected at work. The only way to get some exercise in (after a weekend of eating and relaxing), was after work. And luckily there was still a Sh'Bam class given in the evening, so I could attend that.

Stop. Wait a second.

Me? Sh'Bam?

Well, yes. I have decided to try new things this summer and while Sh'Bam wasn't new to me per se (I had been attending one or two classes before, but it was disastrous), I wanted to get out of my comfort zone in the sense that I would try it again. For one, because it was the only class I could make it to in time and secondly, because I believe in widening my own horizon.

I mean, I enjoy bouldering. I love martial arts, be it MMA or Muay Thai. I've even tried out sword fighting. But dancing scares the living jack out of me. Because I'm no good at it.  Other people might be enjoying themselves greatly in dance classes and be afraid of climbing or boxing, but that's the thing about comfort zones, though: they are personal. I got two left feet and the lack of rhythm to match. When I say, the last Sh'Bam classes I attended were a disaster, I am talking about me being of the beat, being incredibly stiff, not getting the moves "right" and going into the wrong direction and bumping into the person next to me. 

Yesterday was different. I decided to not be bothered by being a little spazzy, because there's one thing everybody's comfort zones have in common: they should be broken every now and then. So, I tried, and then an instructor with whom I've always gotten along quite well, but who had been working at a different gym these last few years, turned out to be giving the class and she was thrilled to see me (as was I to see her). So, there went a lot of the sinking feeling in my stomach, because she can turn even the most dull class into a party. 

And let me tell you, I had fun. Once I started to let go of the thought that I'd have to be perfect, I had loads of fun. Plus, it was an intense workout, even though I did not really realise that at the time. At some point I noticed, I was severely winded, out of breath. From dancing around. It also helped that some of my fav songs - you know, guilty pleasures - were part of the choreo (e.g. Usher's Yeah). Take that, rewind it back. Usher got the voice make your booty go (smack)!

Sh'Bam is a Les Mills Group Fitness Class that features simple but effective dance moves to a wide range of music, from Latin to Pop to Hip Hop to "Golden Oldies". The class is 45 minutes and supposed to burn about 500 kcal. But most of all, it's supposed to be fun. 

MMA and Grit Strength 13 - or: Hearteyes, baby

Yesterday, I had a more relaxed training day, after Monday had been kind of rough. And by relaxed I mean... only 2,5hrs training. MMA and Body Balance. After Monday MMA was hard; we did a lot of hooks and upper cuts and my shoulders were sore from Body Combat and Body Pump the day before. Now, our coach always likes to send us back into the world with a grueling last exercise, yesterday it was jab-cross-tabata. We did jab-cross-combos (either fast or heavy) for a minute and got 20sec rest. Then again combos and rest. We did five rounds of that. Our coach actually took a video from that last set. I'm back there in the white Bad Boy-shorts and my technique is way off, I'm so tired. I wasn't even able to raise my hands properly:

MMA training

But. Today. I finally got to try Grit Strength 13 and I loved it. I did a "light" Body Combat class before and was already pretty done with the world, but I had to prove a point. To myself. Best decision ever. 

I love the new choreo. There's a new move in there: 

New Move

And it's coming up in Track 2 already. As always, track 1 is warm-up. Track 2 is 3 sets of two different moves you do for 30sec first. 3sec break. 10sec reps. 3sec break and a last 10sec rep round. The first move is squat to push press with a bar bell, the second is this new move. 

Track 3 is fun, because you get a little movement into the otherwise static set up: you have two teams facing each other, one does high knees for 30sec, the other upright rows to shoulder press. Then the teams change moves. After two rounds, the teams get new moves. Team 1 does jumping lunges (if there's anything I hate more than burpees, it's jump lunges...*sighs*) and team 2 moving press ups. 

Track 4 was 45sec for each set, first set 7 upright rows and 7 rows, as many rounds as possible. Second set 7 burpees (aaand there they are) and 7 press ups. After you're through with both sets, you do the same, but the rep count goes down from 7 to 5. 

Track 5 was the one minute challenge, where you took your weight plate, did a squat and one squat jump. Then one squat, two squat jumps and so on for - as the name of the challenge says - one minute. As many rounds as possible. I got to 7,4 today. 

And then it's core. And let me tell you, after these last few days, my core was incredibly sore. Actually, I can feel the muscles moving beneath the skin these days, which feels a tad weird, to be honest. I have never been an athletic child, so being an athletic adult still feels strange to me. 

But that's it, that's the new Grit. And I love it, because you can really push yourself to your limits (especially after a Body Combat-class). Came close to barfing today. But that's also the fast level changes, when doing stuff in an upright position and then going down to do a press up or sth of the sort. Does anyone of you know the feeling? It's not even being exhausted, but the fast level changes. 

And tomorrow my best friend is coming to visit for my graduation ceremony and we'll have a blast. She'll be here all weekend, so you'll probably not hear from me in a few days. Have a nice one, guys! :)

New Les Mills releases and a great weekend

June is already almost half way done. But that means that the new Les Mills choreos, the ones that will be with us all summer, have been released at our gym last weekend. On Sunday, to be exact. 

Saturday, to me, was a forced rest day, because I was at work from 7-16, and afterwards I visited a friend for her belated b-day bash. And seeing that we are both that breed of couch potato that does not appreciate wild parties and even wilder outings in town, she decided to bake muffins and pizza for the two of us and make it a movie night. We haven't had movie night in a long time and I haven't had pizza in a long time. For good measure, I also brought a packet of biscotti, and the DVDs: "Man of the Year" with the late Robin Williams and "Johnny English 2", mostly because I've been missing London these last few weeks months.

Home-made pizza!!!

But that's just how I spent my one rest day of the week. Sunday came finally and brought with it the new Body Balance and Body Combat releases (for me, that is). 

The new Balance was different. I find it hard to really judge a choreo after the first time around and with Balance, I'm almost always like... "Meh" after the first try. This time I liked the moves alright, but I wasn't too much into the music. Especially the first track didn't really get me into that "Balance"-feel, you know? 

The sun salutations are nice and I really liked the balance track, but the pilates core training was a bit... I don't know, boring? Plus, it went more on my hip flexors than into my core, but that might also be because my hip flexors are pretty tense most of the time. If it doesn't change, I have to ask our instructors for advice. 

The savasana at the end is great, though. Great music, you can follow along the piano melody lines into relaxation and calmness. And it just sounds pretty. Today, I will be trying Balance for the second time, maybe my feelings toward it will change a little.

In the afternoon I went and tried the new Combat, in which they changed not only the music, but also the lay out/concept of the class. Combat Class feels much fiercer now than it did before and the music reflects that as well. Instead of just being an interval class, it is now a high-intensity interval class, you might also call it HIIT. The first track already differs from its predecessors, even though the first Combat track might remind you of some of the ones that have been done before. It feels incredibly short, though. The first power track is already taking you to a different intensity if you roll with it and the second Combat track, track number 4, is conditioning as it already has been in 63. Number 5, the second power track is reminiscent of GRIT Cardio, with short intervals of hard work and a few breaks for your heart rate to come down. Track 6 killed me, though. I don't know if I ever mentioned that I hate - HATE - lunges. And track 6 has a lot of them. My legs were burning after that and the thought that there were still 2 aerobic tracks to go, one of which Muay Thai, was not a nice one. :D But Muay Thai is great!!! There's power and there's pain in this track and I just love it. You can really play yourself tired in this one. And then there's your basic track 8. But after that choreo, the basic track 8 feels hardcore, too. Conditioning and stretching are fine, there are only so many core exercises you can do and if you've been to a few CX classes, there are few things that are new. 

But after that class, I was done for the day. Really and genuinely done. 

After Body Combat 64. Lower right corner 30 seconds afterward, upper left 30 minutes after, when the endorphins started kicking in. 

Yesterday I did Combat again and afterward (and after a short break) I tried the new Pump. Lots of tension being built up and a pain in the ass. Or should I say a gain in the ass? The squats are okay if you do them so-so, but really engage in the track and shoot, you get your legs to shake. 

Chest hurts like hell with the right weight, I guess, yesterday I took it a little easier because my chest was already done in from the Combat conditioning and I did not know what was coming up. I loved the back track, which was really efficient in building strength and raising heart rates. The triceps track was okay, it was pretty similar to the one in 93, only the dips were a little nastier. Same with the biceps track. That one maybe let me down a little because I had heard beforehand that this one was reeeeaaal tough and then it was... well, I liked the one in 93 better and I got a better burn from it, but let's see what happens, maybe I get to add some weight... And then, lunges. Again. I did them without additional weight because my form goes way off, when I'm tired and doing them with weights. Also, I did not want to and could not find it in me to convince myself as my legs were already close to giving out. And it was good, because it was a lot of bottom ones. The track name "We Make It Bounce" is not a joke, I tell ya. The shoulder track. was. sick. I loved it. It burned and hurt in all the right places! And then there was core and stretching and we were done with that class, too. I liked it. In hindsight, I think I liked it a lot. 

I also kept working on my spine flexibility and yoga over all, after attending a class on Friday, where we were shown a pose called "Bird of Paradise", I made it my mission to perfect that pose. It looked so impossible at first, but actually it's quite easy. And it's a great stretch for your shoulders and legs. 

Bird of Paradise

Also, my hair has been growing so much into an emo thing (with it falling into my eyes all the time), that I have to take it together into a small "pony tail" these days. It looks ridiculous at best, but it is damn practical.

gym "bunny tail"

And now I'll put my hair into the bunny tail (because pony tail is just an exaggeration) and leave for MMA. For the first time in ages. Happy!!!

Someone's gotta have your back

My neck, my back...
Nope, not going there, not a good idea. 

I've been hesitant to share this with a potentially indefinite audience, because I'm still feeling a little ambivalent about this thing myself. But your back is important and you have to take good care of it. Back muscles are one of the fastest muscle group to grow, but still many people fatefully neglect their backs. 

Why am I so concerned with this?

When I was nine years old, I broke my T5. That's the fifth vertebra in the thoracic spine.

I was on bed rest for four weeks, causing the muscles in my legs to deteriorate to the point where I had to learn walking again. The memory was there, but the muscles weren't. It was a scary experience that I wish on nobody, because well, as a toddler you don't get the process, it's nothing you do consciously. Plus, the floor is closer if you fall. But that's a whole other story. Fact is, when I was walking again and living life like nothing happened, I had passed this one on to the closed files. It was something that had happened to me a long time ago and sometimes in "what if..."scenarios I'd realise just how lucky I had been. 

Fast forward ten years. The edge of my left trapezius muscle starts getting stiff on some days. Whenever I move my shoulder blade in an up and down motion, it makes an ugly sound. It's only the left one, though. 

Another few years. I start working out. It's more often than not these days that my shoulder blade catches on the edge of my trapezius and my upper back is tense most of the time. Working out releases some of the tension. Sometimes when the tension lessens, I get aural migraines and have to puke from the pain. Probably just bad posture. Still only the left side.

Another few years later. I start MMA. I'm a leftie. The catching of the shoulder blade on the edge of the muscle, the reduced movement radius and the pain make things a little harder, but not unbearable. It works okay. Not well, but okay. Some days now, my right side starts to show symptoms, too. I've been having this for so long, it can't be that bad.

Summer 2014. Made a strange move with my head when I tried looking over my right shoulder. Can't move without pain. Have to sit down. Go to work where my boss asks me why I'm so pale. Tell her I'm not feeling well. Am sick to my stomach from the pain. After a few hours I cannot sit anymore because it hurts. Decide to stand up. Cannot support the weight of my own head with the muscles in my neck because it hurts so bad. Sit down again. Start crying when the pain comes rushing in in waves. My boss tells me to go to the doctor. Now. Like: NOW! Cannot get up. My boss sends someone to buy pain meds. After I took two 400 Ibuprofens I am able to make it to the doctor's office. Which was about 500m from my workplace. 

The doctor looks at me. Sits behind her desk and looks at me. Asks me where it hurts. Asks me to turn my head. Cannot physically turn my head. Pain. She says I should probably stretch more, go get a massage when everything's a little better. I don't tell her that I do yoga and go see a sports masseuse every other week. I would have probably shown these symptoms earlier if not. She prescribes me muscle relaxants and strong pain meds. As I get up to leave she asks me what I do for a living. If I needed sick leave. I considered it for a moment, then said no. I was part-time cleaning and part-time doing office/human resources work for the same company. I wanted to believe her, when she said, all I needed to do was stretch more. But. It didn't really help. 

The residual pain got stronger. I've never hat acute pain like that after this incident, but my upper back hurt. Every. Single. Day. 

A couple of months ago I realised I was eating pain meds like other people eat candy. I thought about going to the doctor again. Decided against it and stretched more. 

Then, one day, the feeling in my left hand left partly. There was a tingling sensation where I still felt something. I called my boss and asked her to see our work physiotherapist. And Wednesday I went. I finally got to go. She was nice. Asked lots of questions. Told me if she did not know I was in pain, she would have never seen anything. My posture is better than average and outwardly there's not much to see. Then she bend and shaped me a little. Tried the flexibility of my muscles, limbs, how my arms move, everything. 

Finally she said: "There's a slight disturbance somewhere around your C5. And your spine from there down to T5 is really rigid. I believe that this stems from the same trauma that caused the breaking of your T5, but because everybody was focused on the broken vertebra, they might have easily overlooked any trauma in the soft tissue surrounding your spine." 

So there it was. My ghost had come back to haunt me again. And it had brought friends. 

It is a strange feeling when you've been dealing with something a long time ago and have actually found closure, just to find out that nothing is as easy as it seems. I got some spine mobility exercises from my physiotherapist and now - only one and a half day later - I am pain-free for the first time in ages! 

I have to do an exercise similar to this, just a little higher. This mobilises the thoracic spine, if you put the resistance across your shoulder blades, and bend your head back in a half-circle, you mobilise your cervical spine.

There are two things I am feeling right now:

1: relief. Constant pain is something you learn to live with, but you are always kind of strung out, weary, there's always this voice in the back of your head: "It hurts. It hurts. It hurts. Acknowledge the pain." You only realise that when you're pain-free. It's like Bucky Barnes once said: "Worse off became the new normal", but that doesn't mean that worse off is good.

2: anger, frustration at myself for not seeking help years earlier. For letting it come so far. 

So, take good care of your back. Keep old injuries in mind whenever there are symptoms close to them. Go to the doctor on time. Here are some great exercises for spine mobility: 

Utthita Trikonasana expands your chest and shoulders, increases neck mobility and stretches your spinal muscles. Plus many other things. 

And this is one of my favourite exercises to help thoracic mobility. 

And here's kind of a cheat sheet for quick spinal mobility exercises and better posture. 

I hope you got a little bit out of my experience and maybe a little inspiration to give your back a little love <3

Pain and sports

Pain without love

Pain I can't get enough 
Pain I like it rough
Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all
(Three Days Grace - Pain)

"An athlete doesn't see a healthy day" [urheilija ei tervettä päivää näe] - Finnish proverb.

"Push through the pain"

"Love the burn"

"Better sore than sorry"

"No pain, no gain"

We all know these fitspo-slogans coursing up and down the internet. We all want to be brave, we all want to push through the pain, gritting our teeth and be the person who does all this fitspo-superhero-romantic stuff. But how do you know when enough is enough? How do you know that your body can go no further?
Pain actually is a warning sign, it is supposed to tell you that you are not okay. That you should slow down a bit. We all know this, but still we grit our teeth and keep on doing what we're doing until we just physically cannot push any further.
Believe me, I know.

Just a few bruises, a taped-up joint capsule and toe and a swollen ankle...

I'm still trying to figure out what the right measure is. When to stop. I'm the worst when it comes to not giving in to reason because it feels like giving up.
In January I woke up one morning and started crying when I tried to get out of bed, but was so sore that I needed about two minutes to just sit up. Everything hurt. But the worst thing was: it had been that way for the last four and a half months. I woke up this one January morning and realised that I could not remember a day when nothing in my body ached within the last four and a half months. It had been enough. I took a week-long break. I had gone all this time doing sometimes up to 20 hours worth of workouts or stretching or anything at all related to sports a week, most weeks making do with one rest day. Sometimes none. I remember there being a streak where I had gone almost twenty days without rest. I was hanging at the end of my rope. And there I was, trying to sit up, crying. But why do we let it get so far?

For me it was pride, one of my main triggers, and the will to prove that I was just as good, just as strong, just as robust as the guys. No, I wanted to be better than the guys. As the only girl working out and training with a bunch of guys, you get this false sense of having to prove you're worth it. Having to prove that you can take a hit. You feel like you have to put in twice the work the guys do, show them you are indestructible, not realising that all you achieve is destruction.
And I wanted to compete in MMA. I had to improve, no matter what the cost, I could not simply skip training because something hurt. I broke my toe and kept on going. I couldn't walk right, but that didn't keep me from jumping, lifting, and sparring. I taped it, it hurt like hell every time I removed the tape. It didn't heal properly. But... everyone was doing it. Our trainer had all his toes taped. It was a running gag. Broken toes and training with them are an everyday thing.
I messed up the joint capsule of my right big toe a few weeks later. Hurt real bad. Still hurts and it's been almost four months. Again, I couldn't walk properly. Again, I taped it. Am still taping it before some training sessions.
I can't move my right thumb right, because I once hit a right hook a little off kilter and my thumb connected with the pad, there was a strange noise and pain. Didn't matter, I had a match coming up.
The knuckles in my boxing gloves were bruised and/or bloody a few times, but there was still three training eras to go. So I went the whole nine yards. Got a few pale scars on my knuckles these days.

no need to explain this, is there? 

And then there are the bruises. Lots and lots of bruises. Some hurt more, some less.

This one hurt a little more...ouchie

And last but not least, the soreness. The feeling that you just cannot get out of bed in the morning because your body just hurts.
And what for? Pride. A false sense of achievement when you swap war stories with your peers. And then you get to the point, where you're super girl. When your trainer tells the rest of the group: "Guys, just look at the lady. Now there's a good example for all of you!" or someone just says in passing: "Well, but no challenge for you, it's probably child's play to you." They don't see that you hurt. And how could they when you've become so good in just pushing harder whenever it hurt.
And at some point you start to believe your own press.


When I got the news that even my last match of the season - the fourth cancellation this spring - would not happen because there was no suitable opponent, I crashed totally. Only then, the excitement and anticipation leaving me, did I realise just how messed up my body was. And not because someone else told me to keep on going, but because I kept telling myself that I had to. I got an all-or-nothing kind of attitude that makes it hard for me to slow down once I've found something I like, I'm crazy ambitious/competitive and I have this slightly addictive nature. Sports tickles that the wrong way sometimes. I have to learn to do the moderation thing. I'm working on it.

A good start was my trainer, who at one point told me to remember to rest. When that did not help, he actually told me to keep my feet still the rest of the day and the next day. Rest. Whenever I'd look too tired, he'd ask me what kind of workouts I had done that week, how many rest days I'd had. If he didn't like the answer, he told me to slow down. If the answer was alright, he'd tell me to remember to eat. At one point he continuously told me to remember to eat well. I had probably lost too much weight/speed/strength at that point and didn't even notice myself. A good trainer with your best interests at heart is worth everything and more.
But what if you don't have that voice of reason?

A) Learn to distinguish different forms of pain. There is good pain (like the burning in your thighs after you did a hard squat set) and then there's bad pain (like the stinging pain in your knee after you've been doing deep squats on five days in a row without a rest day and maximum weights). Those are just extreme examples. If a certain movement hurts, don't do it or get someone to tell you if your technique/posture/etc. is right.
B) Good pain can become bad pain, too. Remember my soreness-story? Not good. You need to give your body some well earned rest if you want to see muscle/strength growth or any kind of development.
C) Listen to your body. This sounds easier than it actually is because there are all these other motivators screaming over the voice of your body. But if your body says it's not a good day to get in a Body Pump/Combat/Step/Attack-session, then don't go because the instructor's cute (been there, done that :P), don't go because you ate that cupcake and now have to train off the calories (it doesn't really work like that anyway), don't go because you always go (most stupid reason I ever had..."But I always go to this class") and don't go to prove a point to anyone. Not even yourself.

Now, keep in mind that I'm still struggling with these. I still believe there are things worth going through pain. That jacked up ankle in the picture? I didn't tap out in a tournament. And escaped and got my opponent sweeped afterwards. It wasn't pretty, but it gave me that small experience of success.
Hello, my name is Kitty and I am a sports addict. But it's been 8 days since my last incident.